I am starting to lose interest in work. Not as a concept on a whole but specifically what I am doing. If anything I’d be the one person who takes pride in the final results of my work but with the shitload of responsibility and work I am being handed, it’s fucking impossible to live up to my own standards. And I hate it. It’s not even a reasonable amount of work for what I’m getting paid. Am starting to wonder if this is the reason you’re all cynics. And why no one ever works for Passion, because Passion is fun but at the end of the day it doesn’t pay bills.

Right this second it feels like someone just gave me a wakeup call… welcome to the working world.

The way people laugh and ridicule the thought of attending Blue’s concert tonight for FREE, you’d think it was an invitation to a gay induction. Not that there is anything ridiculous about gay people, but society can be stupidly narrow-minded. But then again, I too, giggled at the thought.. only because I don’t like boy-band-type concerts. And only because a certain amount of tolerance is required to endure high-pitch screams of adolescent PYTs and leave the place with ear drums intact. Besides, I find boys in tight pants gyrating to pop music… amusing. Giggle.

Not turning down Alicia Keys, though. Am trying to devise an evil plan to tag along with editorial to the press conference on Tuesday.

Anyone up for Bond’s concert? Let me know (I’ll see if I can hook you up).

Why the sudden influx of concerts, anyway? Or is it just me not noticing because I’m buried in A4 printouts?

It has occurred to me to post up some pictures of my mad weekend. Too bad I didn’t actually have one. But I’m sure everyone else had some form of fun involving loud music and imbibing cocktail after shooter. I miss those days. I’m complaining but I’m not going to do anything about it — hah!

Besides working a full day on Saturday, all we did was stay in with lots of food (this might explain my recent 4kg weight gain) watching Troy and King Arthur in succession. The similarities between the two movies are a little drab, but then again you can’t get too creative with valiant heroes and fearless chick plots. Can’t say it was a bad weekend though- having Brad and Ioan (that’s Lancelot) running around covered in grime for 5 hours was rather entertaining.

And it’s Monday again. Catches up on you real quick, doesn’t it?

In my inbox this morning from Jo:

“I am off to Melbourne fashion week from the 22 October to 29th October — wanna come??”

We missed the last one because I was skipping countries. And history likes to repeat itself — some time during that period I will be attempting to scale the Great Wall and have coffee with a friend amidst the hustle and bustle of old China. Or new. I will find out.

On the phone 2 minutes ago:

“We got your number from Lavinie of Dance Space. We heard you can dance hip hop. Would you like to come for casting for a TV commercial?”

I think they got the wrong Stephanie. I’ve only ever been there once and it was for cardio hip hop. Anyway, it was for Kotex, and I declined. I do not want to be seen on national TV bopping to a sanitary pad jingle. I already am ridiculous enough. Already forming in my head — ‘Kotex pads are fuckin’ radz’. Urk.

Am off home to ‘freshen up’ before I head to Zouk for JUICE DJ Quest. Desperately need another graphic designer or two to come in full-time. I’m not sure if I can juggle 5 mags a month. It’s starting to kill me. Email me your resumes?

Back when I was still studying in Wanganui, minor quakes were an everyday occurence. Most of the time you won’t feel it. There are tell-tale signs - water in cups, especially - that otherwise contradicts the lack of sensory but I always know. I am a paranoid person when it comes to shifting grounds. Or shifting anything, for that matter. I remember once being in a museum and walking into a makeshift living room which was meant to move and shake to stimulate what an earthquake feels like. The television was tuned to CNN and the floorboards were creaky. I didn’t like it.

Another time, after too many rides on Dreamworld’s (Australia) Wipe Out, whenever I sat still I could feel the rest of the world moving. At dinner, I felt like I was still on the ride and half expecting my plate of potatoes to come flying up at me. It was strange. Your perception of reality shifts, literally.

It’s happening again, right now. The management has decided to start digging just behind our offices, and every once in a while the building will shake. I watch from the balcony when I go for cigarette breaks. It’s strange to see those huge machines at work.

Oh boy, Sapporo sounds like a fun place to visit and work for 2 months. I definately won’t be able to go, but one of you creative sorts might! I’ve always wanted to visit Japan. I have a friend there now, which helps a whole lot with the language barrier.

I wish. I need to leave the country for a week or so. The urge to travel is becoming somewhat unbearable and the daily grind serves only as a reminder that I am still here. I don’t know why this bugs me. These days I can’t even start my day without a double espresso.

Last I checked, I was middle-class personified.

But today, all that will change. You see, I have 15 million US Dollars waiting to be claimed.. that is, if I take on a selfless project in helping the handicapped and the poor. All this, and more, funded by a very generous lady from South Africa. Her story? Rich dad, killed by mob. Husband and child, killed by mob. Mob looking for her, but they don’t know that she has only six months left to live because she has a very ’severe’ cancer of the brain. Thus, she selected me for the task of taking the money from a security company in Europe if I would be willing to help the Purpose.

How very, very exciting.

I forgot to mention, also, that last week, two women from Namibia approached me (via email) with 10 million US Dollars to help them spread the word of God where I am. Their story is somewhat similar to the above lady, except that anti-Christian big guns are hunting them down. But nothing beats the AIDS-ridden man who has 2 months to live and wants to give me 10 million US Dollars to help start another AIDS research institute.. because he can’t do it himself as his dead wife’s murderers are after him. Of course, he realises that the research institute isn’t going to cure him in time but he wishes to help others in similar situations.

I really am going to be rich from saving the world in three clicks.. hello, snotty upper crust!

I’d like to thank everyone for the well wishes and some for the generous offers to donate blood. My dad is doing well, and hopefully he will be out of the hospital next week.

In the meantime, life goes on.. work is still killing me. I was just thinking about what I’d be saying to my next potential employers — I love my job and my colleagues but working on 5 magazines a month is just too much to handle? I can’t focus on any one product because I lack time, so I want to work for just one magazine? I wish. Not that I’m thinking of leaving this job. It has its pros.

Checked out Zion-I at Zouk last night (Salem Innovation Sessions). My heart’s just not in partying anymore these days.. mainly because there is so much else going on in my life and I’d rather get sleep at night. I left straight after the sessions, before Ghetto Heaven started. It’s good, however, to note that the hip hop culture in Malaysia is very much alive and kicking.

Kudos to Sphere Mag for the xoxoxo If you haven’t seen it already, check it out, it’s a pretty cool mag. Also:
Half empty
This is a Magazine
Buffalo
Magwerk

Feel free to post any links to cool online mags that you may have come across!

Do excuse the absence of posts recently. There is a family emergency that I have been attending to.. my father has been admitted to the hospital and life has been a little topsy turvy since. I don’t really feel like talking about it yet (reality is taking time to sink in properly) but if anyone I know out there has O- blood and willing to donate some, please get in contact. Sorry for being so vague. :/

First there was the confessions blog de jour from a London belle.. now a New York escort has also jumped on the blog bandwagon. Prada, Jimmy Choos and Sex. Yes, please!